'The two enemies of human happiness are pain and boredom.'

We all have days when we feel bored or frustrated. But what is happening when we can’t shake our dark moods? When our frustrations start to intensify and dominate our days? These are signs that something is wrong. Instead of our energy flowing out into life in a fulfilling way, it is blocked inside and works against us. When we are feeling depressed the critical question is why. The source of o…

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The first mirror is the mother's face

'There is a gleam in the mother's eye which says it is good you are here and I acknowledge your being here and I am uplifted by your presence.' Heinz Kohut 'What does the baby see when he or she looks at the mother’s face? ... what the baby sees is himself or herself.' Donald Winnicott

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On secrets

‘The striving for the right to have secrets from which the parents are excluded is one of the most powerful factors in the formation of the ego.’ Victor Tausk. ‘The patient who comes to us has a story that is not told, and which as a rule no one knows of. To my mind, therapy only really begins after the investigation of that wholly personal story. It is the patient's secret, the rock against which…

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On the unlived life and its consequences

'When we feel restless, bored, or empty despite an outer life filled with riches, the unlived life is asking for us to engage. As you may have already discovered, doing or acquiring more does not quell your unease or dissatisfaction. Neither will “meditating on the light” or attempting to rise above the sufferings of earthly existence. Only awareness of your shadow qualities can help you to find an …

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Museum of Fine Arts, Boston

Positive change

You feel stuck and sense the need for change. But what kind of change will be change for the better? Do you look outside yourself for new relationships, a new career, new experience and adventure? Or do you look within to renew your ideas about who you are and your assumptions about the meaning and purpose of your life? Often what is called for is a highly personal balance of inner and outer…

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